This perplexing phenomenon, deeply rooted in psychology, is known as “secondary gain,” and it serves as a concealed obstacle that impedes the realization of our aspirations.
Secondary gain emerges when there is an underlying advantage in maintaining certain behaviors or conditions, even as we consciously strive for fulfilling relationships, abundant prosperity, or optimal health. Despite our sincere efforts, secondary gain silently works to keep us in a state of loneliness, financial struggle, or poor health.
Allow me to share the story of June, an exceptionally talented therapist of African-American descent, who offered a glimpse into the intricacies of secondary gain during a profound conversation.
“Making money has never been an issue for me since my teenage years,” she shared. “However, I perpetually find myself squandering or misusing my wealth.” Although June had no trouble attracting financial abundance, she struggled to hold onto it.
Intrigued by the concept of secondary gain, I posed a seemingly absurd question to June: “What benefits do you derive from being in a financially precarious state?”
Naturally, the conscious mind would reject such a notion, exclaiming, “There are no advantages to being broke! How could I possibly gain anything from that? It’s preposterous, Dawson. Impoverishment can never be advantageous to any aspect of my life!”
Nevertheless, as June and I embarked on a deeper exploration, we unraveled a subconscious belief that perpetuated her recurring pattern. Generations of financial struggle plagued her family’s history, and subconsciously, June held onto the belief that becoming wealthy would result in a loss of love and acceptance from her tribe. In essence, she feared breaking the code of her community and losing their affection.
While June conscientiously pursued financial stability, her subconscious attachment to the secondary gain of belonging and love through shared financial struggles hindered her progress. The unmasking of secondary gain necessitates delving beneath the surface, unearthing the ways in which seemingly detrimental circumstances covertly serve our hidden needs.
Astonishingly, one prominent neuroscientist estimates that approximately 70% of our brain’s capacity is dedicated to detecting and responding to threats. For June’s subconscious mind, accumulating wealth was perceived as perilous, influenced by our innate survival instinct to avoid potential threats.
This neurobiological wiring, inherited from our ancestors, causes us to focus extensively on identifying everything that is wrong in our surroundings. As a result, when secondary gain intertwines with this survival system, it effectively sabotages what we are holding as our conscious intentions.
However it is crucial to recognize that secondary gain does not manifest in every situation. Some circumstances, such as genetic illnesses, incompatible relationships, or economic downturns, are likely to not have secondary gain as an underlying factor. In delving into the potential benefits of challenging circumstances, surprising insights can emerge—leading to significant breakthroughs.
Thankfully, once June identified the presence of secondary gain in her life, she actively sought therapy, tapped into her inner resources, and engaged in meditation to release her stress response towards money.
Through this transformative journey, she granted herself permission to experience financial prosperity while still feeling connected to her community. June propelled herself forward by aligning her subconscious beliefs with her conscious intentions, now that she was aware of this previously hidden conflict in her psyche.
When affirming your intentions, it is essential to pay attention to any internal voices that oppose your well-being. Instead of silencing them, listen attentively. These seemingly destructive voices may instead hold valuable wisdom which news to be integrated into your worldview so as to propel you forward.
By harmoniously blending these insights, your entire being can now progress in complete harmony with your goals, liberated from the grip of secondary gain. With conscious intention and inner alignment, we can break free from the chains that hold us back and manifest our dreams with unwavering clarity and purpose.
Learn many more manifestation and mental healing concepts in Dawson Church’s blog archive today!